Friday, April 17, 2009

Recently posted on craigslist In the Portland area (Funny!)

To the woman that crapped in my car. (NE Portland ) We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that. I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there.


I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you. At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost.. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don't feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meant to be funny, not offensive. I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling". I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat... What I am trying to say is that I f you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.


I await your call,TadP.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early. Touché

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

After looking into a handful of the blog articles on your
site, I honestly like your technique of blogging. I saved as
a favorite it to my bookmark webpage list and will be checking back
soon. Take a look at my web site too and tell me what you think.


My website; essential cthulhu mythos books

Anonymous said...

Greate article. Keep posting such kind of information on your site.
Im really impressed by your site.
Hey there, You've done a fantastic job. I'll definitely digg it and personally suggest
to my friends. I am confident they'll be benefited from this website.

Stop by my homepage book of ra tricks 2012 (http://redhosts.ru/)